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=angelbabiau

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Complications

Journal Entry: Sat Jun 27, 2009, 9:39 PM
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Nothing has been going right for quite sometime...I'm at the same stage I was 10 years ago...only it's taken me half the time to get back here again, to the point where I can't see any real way out. I can't talk to my other half....I think we hate each other actually and just this past week, I was more than willing to sacrifice everything I have ever believed in....just to make this work.I'm giving in....I don't yet know exactly what that means but all I know is, we are not exactly friends anymore and I don't feel as though what I was planning to do would really make things any better. I can't take the drama anymore. Ignorance is bliss if your the one giving out....

Basically what I am saying is...until I find myself again, I'm never going to be me, I'm never going to be creative. I feel like I can't be happy...ever. The happiness I had is gone forever and even though this is stupid to say, I feel so alone right now.

This is all amplified by being thousands of miles from my own damn country....my family and what few real friends I have made in this life.

It's all dark and gloomy but even though I can't see it yet..it will pass.Right?

3 Comments
  • Mood: Humiliated
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:iconangelbabiau:
=angelbabiau Jul 7, 2009, 2:25:24 PM
You two are always so wonderful, thank you very much :) :heart:
:iconwitchofnature:
=WitchOfNature Jun 29, 2009, 9:22:18 AM
:cuddle:
As Sheerie already did say - It will pass!
Please just allow it to pass ...

You are already figuring out what is going wrong - what went wrong ... you've no longer been yourself.
Denying who you are and what you are longing for - can lead to a breakdown.
Unfortunately, I do know that just too well ... and I have the same fear ... fearing I will - one time - end up where I've already been once.

But on the other hand - I know that I don't want to be there again.

It is hard to get out of there. I just managed it with a very good therapist - the will to get out of there - my best friend - my mother ... and not to forget the love of my spiritual companions, fathers and guides!

I am now on my way back to who I really am ... it is a damn hard way - but the path is filled with joy as well. Slowly taking step by step more towards ME - a gorgeous feeling!

Of course, I am not you ... but I know that you can do it as well!
I know that you will make it!
I do believe in you!
Just allow it to happen!
:hug:

If you do need someone - just note me.
I am always willing to help you with what I can offer (energy work, etc.).

Feel loved and embraced
:heart:

Tricia

--
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take - but by the places and moments that take our breath away! ~Anonymous~ :heart:
 :floating:
I am loving my inner self - what about you?
:iconsheeriethefay:
*SheerieTheFay Jun 28, 2009, 5:15:34 AM
It will pass!
And I send all good energies and thoughts and "astral" help you need, dear.
I know that point, it is awful and I so hope that you'll feel better soon.
I myself am on my way back to myself, with all the doubts and fears that tend to arise then.

--
Ordinary riches can be stolen, real riches cannot.
In your soul are infinitely precious things
that cannot be taken from you.</i>
Oscar Wilde
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